dream
i had this dream it woke me up. i was with brad in the park like some cheeseass movie KATE would probly like but then he wasn’t brad he was my dad instead. i didn’t freak but then he went away toward this woman i never saw her but i know she was there. it was my mom.
he wouldn’t talk he just looked at her slow and she didn’t talk either just looked. but then she was KATE instead and he talked and talked like an idiot.
then they were gone that bitch and i was lookig for brad again. people were in the park eating on giant towels and i started freaking. i asked them all where brad was but no one would talk to me they were all eating. it got dark and then i was walking to a house. i knew it was brad’s house but i have never seen brad’s house real house because he lives in elizabeth lakes but nobody was home. the house was dark and the whole street was dark and i fell over. when i hit the ground it was all wet and i woke up.
heather said dreams always mean something but i know she’s wrong it is so stupid. best friends can be stupid some times.
he blows
my dad is an idiot. he blows. i need new “underwear” but i can’t tell him he gets all wierd. i should maybe talk to KATE about it but never mind it would be even wierder probly.
how many more months until american idle? tv is so shitty now. KATE is so stupid she watches dancing with the has-beens and dad sometimes watches too. such shit.
brad was talking with mike and scott the whole period today so he didn’t look over. at least he didn’t look at britney that i know of. i wanted to see but i didn’t want to look. i wished i was absent in class. i wonder if he wonders where all his myspace hits are coming from.
he looked at me?
so remember just like i said in 2nd period i was going to go talk to brad and really this time. no more chickenshitting. so i was all ready but then HE LOOKED AT ME and omg i freaked. i couldn’t move! i tried not to smile but i couldn’t help it so i looked at the floor. i hope he didn’t see me smile. then i just couldn’t do it.
but then at my locker i told heather all about it. she said no he was looking at britney who was sitting right behind me. not behind me but the other side of me from where brad was looking. so HEATHER THINKS HE WAS LOOKING AT HER and i still feel so idiotic like some baby freshman. BRITNEY IS SUCH A BITCH i should have known!!! first she went after dylan over summer and now this i wish i had never been her friend i hate her.
heather told me i should just try again but she doesn’t know how it felt when he looked at me and when i smiled at the floor. she has no idea. if she knew how it felt and then finding out he was looking at bitchy britney (probbly) then she would never think that definitely not say it.
later liz said heather was stupid and brad really was lookign at me but i know she’s wrong.
PLEASE!
OMG! Okay, I woke up this morning and I suddenly realized – I DON’T HAVE A BLOG! I mean, WTF?! So I took my dad’s high blood pressure medicine and calmed down. I’m okay now, thanks. AND NOW I HAVE A BLOG! So that means I EXIST.
It does, right?
So anyway… today in second period I’m going to see Brad. And this time I’m actually going to talk to him.
Or maybe I won’t….
Should I? Should I?! What do you think? PLEASE tell me!
Whew! My first blog entry EVER. I exist now, right? Do I? Do I exist now?
My dad should be okay with Flintstones instead of his blood pressure medicine today, right?
PLEASE come back tomorrow!!!
PLEASE READ MY DIARY 